Nesting: Creating Stability and Consistency for Kids After Divorce with Kathleen Brigham | ep.60

Join us in this enlightening episode as we explore the concept of nesting with Kathleen Brigham, a certified divorce mediator, and co-author of 'The Nesting Experiment: Two Divorces, Seven Kids, and Six Years of Uncomfortable Cohabitation.' Nesting, a post-separation arrangement where children remain in a stable environment while parents transition in and out, offers valuable insights into fostering stability and minimizing disruption during divorce.

Discover why incorporating nesting can benefit children and parents alike, and explore practical strategies for implementing this approach. Kathleen shares her expertise on creating boundaries and structure during this tumultuous time, offering valuable takeaways for co-parenting effectively.

In this episode, we discuss:

• The concept of nesting and its benefits for children post-separation
• Different versions of nesting arrangements
• Addressing common hurdles faced by parents during divorce
• Tips for maintaining stability and consistency for kids during and after divorce
• The importance of a detailed parenting plan outlining responsibilities, values and expectations
• Navigating the dynamics of blended families

Even if you're happily married, this conversation provides valuable insights into communication and parenting strategies that can strengthen any family dynamic. Tune in for actionable advice and compassionate guidance on navigating divorce and supporting children through transition.

Share this episode with a friend who may benefit from Kathleen's wisdom, and join us as we delve into the importance of helping children find their new normal after a separation.

Connect with Kathleen
The Nesting Experiment

What is bird nesting after divorce

Key takeaways

1. Nesting as a Parenting Solution: Nesting, where the children remain in a stable environment and the parents come and go, can be a beneficial arrangement post-separation. It minimizes disruption for the children and allows them to stay in one place while the parents transition in and out.
2. Flexibility in Arrangements: Nesting can take various forms, from sharing a home to having separate residences where children remain stable. The arrangement should suit individual circumstances and be focused on the children's well-being.
3. Effective Communication: Utilizing technology for communication between co-parents can facilitate coordination and minimize conflict. Texting updates about children's activities and well-being can help keep both parents informed and involved.
4. Setting Boundaries: While fostering a close relationship with the children is important, maintaining boundaries is equally vital. Structure and consistency help children feel secure, even if it means enforcing rules like bedtime.
5. Quality Time Over Quantity: Prioritizing quality time with children over the quantity of time spent together is crucial. Meaningful interactions, even in short durations, can strengthen the parent-child bond.

6. Parenting Plan: A detailed parenting plan outlining responsibilities, values, and expectations can help navigate potential conflicts and maintain consistency across households.

7. Self-Care for Parents: Modeling self-care behavior is essential for children to learn healthy habits. Parents should prioritize their well-being to demonstrate the importance of balance and self-care.

8. Blended Families: In blended families, clear communication and respect for each parent's role are crucial. Acknowledging and respecting the presence and role of biological parents, as well as step-parents, helps maintain harmony within the family dynamic.