#1: Turning challenging moments into opportunities to build rapport with your child - Kristi Nellor
In this conversation Kristi shares how taking care of her tween daughter who stayed at home with a broken leg for a few months turned out to be a great opportunity to build rapport with her. We also talk about setting limits, helping kids develop their independence, creating space where they feel safe to take on challenges, fail and then try again. Kristi shares some powerful tools for building confidence and a lot of great ideas for family practices that create a nurturing atmosphere at home.
At the end of the interview I have put together a list of the tools Kristi mentions in our conversation to help you put these ideas to practice.
Kristi Nellor is the Founder and Chief Creative Officer of the lifestyle brand, The Hell Yes! Habit where she is on a mission to spark a movement to live a life you love! After decades as a NYC Creative Director for award-winning, multimillion dollar brands she has evolved her work to help individuals, entrepreneurs, and companies alike to clear obstacles, find their essence, embody their mission, and bring any vision to life. Relying on her deep belief that creativity always saves the day, Kristi creates the safe and playful space for transformation to unfold. She is also an empowerment mindset coach, inspirational speaker, international best-selling author, and the Host of The Hell Yes! Habit Podcast - all of which focus on saying yes to yourself and living your best life on your own terms.
Connect with Kristi:
The Hell Yes! Habit Podcast
Kristinellor.com
IG: k_nellor
FB: Kristi Nellor
MORE FROM BILLY:
Grab my FREE Guide - Parent-Child Communication Guide : 10 Secrets to Stronger Bonds
Support the show with a one time donation. Visit my ko-fi page
Follow me on Instagram @ your_childs_full_potential to stay updated about upcoming episodes and behind-the-scenes content.
Like my page on Facebook
Subscribe to the show on Youtube
Visit the website unlockyourchildsfullpotential.com to explore additional resources related to this episode.
Takeaways:
- When it comes to setting limits, let your kids know where you’re coming from, that you’re not just instituting rules for the sake of instituting rules or because you’re in control. Share with them why this is important to you. It's either something you have dealt with and came out on the other side of or it’s something that you have a little bit more experience with it, you are giving them the landscape, you are not telling them what to do, but you are letting them know where the pitfalls might lie so they can make their decision.
- Create space so they can fail and know that they are safe. That way they’ll take on more challenges.
- Create a family mantra, a guiding principle for the year and make a piece of artwork around it. Hang it by the front door so every time you and your kids walk by it you are reminded of what you committed to. A sign like Kristi’s Be Courageous helps you leave the house every morning on this high energy. This is a great idea for a family tradition, something you do together to celebrate the New Year.
- The power of yet is a great tool for building confidence. And is as simple as making it a habit to add the word yet to every “I can’t” statement. When you put the word yet at the end of any sort of limiting sentence all of a sudden it creates possibility. It gives our children the inner power to believe in themselves.
- Teach them that mistakes are really beautiful and celebrate them. Here’s another awesome idea for a family practice. - At the dinner table ask the kids a question like - what mistake did you make today? and then after they share, follow up with “Okay, good job acknowledging that! Why is it a mistake? How could you change that? You want to teach them that mistakes are where we learn most. if they hadn’t made that mistake they wouldn’t have known what the steps are to get better. Celebrate the mistakes because they give us a whole big piece of information.
- Use phrases or acronyms like YAABA (meaning you are a bad ass) to change kids’ perspective and help them snap out of a moment when they’re spiralling into self-doubt or other negative thoughts. It could be any phrase you choose with them beforehand.It’s aimed to serve as an anchor and give them confidence in time of need. Selecting an acronym allows them to be a little bit secretive and use it in public more freely.
Listen On
